2023-01-31 Tue 14:20 PM ![[moses_inside_the_mind_are_colorful_subsystems_and_energy_flows_844916c2-6ee7-42a2-b350-ef25680352b3.png]] > [!-cf-]+ [[Related notes]] > - [[Internal Family Systems (IFS)|IFS]] From [[Ref. Richard Schwartz and Martha Sweezy 2019 - Internal Family Systems therapy, 2nd edition]] (p. 108): > - When a client describes her problem we ask questions about her inner experience around the problem and feed back what we hear, adding the phrase, “So one part of you... and another part... .” > - Once the client has identified a few parts, we ask which one she wants to help first and > - if it seems like a protector we ask if any other parts have concerns; then we help any reactive parts and proceed to get to know the target part. > - If the target seems like an exile, however, we tread more cautiously, first addressing the problem of exile overwhelm and any protector fears. > > - Throughout this process we look for the client’s inner polarities, which can involve a manager and a firefighter or a manager and a manager, keeping in mind the essential difference in the roles of managers and firefighters: > - Managers tend to be preemptive and controlling in their efforts to keep exiles from activating; > - firefighters jump into action after an exile is activated, either reactively and impulsively distracting from or dousing the flames of exiled emotion. > > - As they take action, protective parts have a few common concerns. > - They fear each other (she would be too angry, he would be too passive) or > - they fear exiles (she would be overwhelmed by sadness, he would know he’s unlovable). > - Additionally, they are often concerned about their own fate (If I don’t have this job, will I disappear?). > - As we get to know these parts, we can ask them what would happen if they stopped doing their job. The answer tells us if their first fear involves a polarized protector or a fragile exile. > - We address their fears by proposing that the client’s Self can take care of the exile or help that polarized protector de-escalate, and reassuring them that they will be free to choose a new role. > > - Once protectors give permission for the client’s Self to help an exile (and the timeline for this will range widely), the Self can form a trusting relationship with the exile and ask what it needs. > - Most exiles need the client’s Self to witness burdening experiences from the past. In this case, the Self accompanies the exile to the past and, after the exile feels fully witnessed, the Self offers to do whatever the part needed someone to do at the time (a do-over, which is an emotionally corrective experience). > - Finally, when the exile is ready, the Self brings it out of the past and invites it to let go of its burdens. > - During witnessing and unburdening, the exile is in charge of all decisions. > - After the exile unburdens and invites in the qualities it will need going forward, the Self returns to protectors to see if they are ready to take new jobs.